What Lies Beneath
by Jack-Renee-Love
Summary: Jack Bauer & Renee Walker
1. Chapter 1

_Writer's Note: This is my first Jack & Renee fan fiction and I am very nervous because I do not see my self as a writer! I just wanted to give writing a fan fiction a shot! Please review in order to help me write a better story! I would like to send a huge thanks to Tiffany for reviewing and editing my story and also a huge thanks to Lisa for the amazing title! You guys rock! I hope you enjoy reading this! P.S. - I know there is a change in narrative! I did that on purpose! Feedback is very much appreciated! Thanks! :)_

**What Lies Beneath**

_Chapter One_

She was a monster. A monster that no one would want, or even look at. She either physically or mentally destroyed every relationship. Not to mention the horrible acts of violence she had committed to get justice, if not for others, for herself.

She had lost both her parents in a car accident when she was only six and was then raised by her grandmother, who passed away seven years ago. Her sister was alive and well, but wanted nothing to do with her, which was easy to understand considering what she had done to her. She lost her Sister, she had lost Larry and she had lost…Jack.

Jack…the one man who truly understood her, she had pushed away. Ever since the day she had worked with Jack and found out he would die a painful death, she never spoke or returned any of his calls. By the time she found out Jack was alive and well, she had self destructed into a dark place. A place that she did not want to expose to Jack's happiness. A place where she could not come back from.

-0-0-0-0-

I have nothing left to live for. Nobody would want me, nobody would want what thing I have become. Nobody could ever love this monster. The mirror reflection of myself is afraid of who I have become. Nothing…I have nothing.

I stared at myself, I stared at the dead, lifeless body I had become. I was nothing but pale, powder shaded skin. There was no life, no emotion, no hope left in a single blood vessel in my body.

Before I could stop myself I grabbed a glass cup and smashed it against the mirror, smashing it into a thousand pieces. The glass shards were like a puzzle of a thousand pieces, impossible to put back together. At the given moment those glass shards were the solution to my lifeless puzzle.

All I could feel was a numbness, a pain that almost felt peaceful. Finally my pain was sucked away, into a black hole I hoped would never come back. I felt free…Free to release myself…to the point where I could let go and never come back.

Darkness.

-0-0-0-0-


	2. Chapter 2

_Writer's Note: Hope you enjoy the second chapter! More Updates coming soon! :) Please Review! :)_

_Chapter 2_

**Two Months Later**

If only he knew that every time I thought of him he made me want to live life again.

-0-0-0-0-

Every day since after the hospital I haven't wanted to live another day. Nothing was worth living for…except…

Jack Bauer.

Every second I spent thinking about him and our time together was another second I spent thinking about the future.

Every second otherwise, I never saw a future.

-0-0-0-0-

I haven't seen Jack since the day we met.

My heart broke into a thousand pieces having to watch Jack go through the physical and emotional pain.

Someone like Jack never deserved to suffer in that manner, especially after everything he has done for our country.

It wasn't until a week before I went to the hospital that I heard that Jack would survive after enduring a painful recovery.

By that time, it was too late to save me.

I was beyond the point of return. I made my mind up that I was a monster. A monster that the world would be better without.

-0-0-0-0-

At this point in time, I still suffer inside even though my emotions have become "more stable" according to my doctor. But I still feel worthless.

The one thing I am longing to have is someone to be with, someone to talk with, someone who understands my pain.

Every day I spent in the hospital made me long to have someone.

To have Jack Bauer.

-0-0-0-0-

I fell in love with Jack that day.

He understood me. I understood him.

The pain he felt I felt. What I felt he felt.

He could empathize with the pain I was going through.

He was there for me. Then gone.

-0-0-0-0-


	3. Chapter 3

_Writer's Note: Thank you for all the reviews! I appreciated it very much! I want to say thank you to Tiffany for her ideas and editing! You are amazing! From this point forward I am going to put whose perpective that Chapter is written in. It will appear right under the chapter number! I hope this helps with any confusion! Please keep reviewing so I can keep wrtiting a better story! Thanks & Enjoy! :)_

_Chapter 3_

_(Renee's Perspective)_

Every message from Jack I have saved. Every word.

As much as I want to talk to Jack...to see Jack, I can't stand the thought that my problems would infect his peaceful life. Jack has faced what he has done, he has faced death many times and now he is with his family and is finally happy. Who am I to destroy that. I am the last thing he needs.

The last thing he needs in his life.

-0-0-0-0-

Every time he called my heart froze.

I wanted to pick up the phone...talk to him...tell him about my pain. But every time the little voice in the back of my head said, "Don't do it Renee...You will only ruin his life...Take away his happiness."

Frozen.

_Beep_.

-0-0-0-0-

Every message was different. Every message was the same.

He always said something new. He was always concerned and available to talk.

I wanted to call him.

But I couldn't.

-0-0-0-0-

Jack's last message recorded a week and a half ago.

-0-0-0-0-

_Renee, it's Jack. I take it you don't want me to call anymore. You haven't returned any of my calls. It's okay, even though I wish you would just talk to me. I don't want to constantly bother you anymore. So just always know I am here to talk. Call if you ever want to talk. I am always here for you. _

_Beep._

-0-0-0-0-

He knew what I had done.

The pain.

I wanted to talk.

But I couldn't.

-0-0-0-0-

I need to move forward with my life. Move on.

I want nothing more than to talk and see Jack but I have decided I have to move on, for Jack's sake.

It's over. Nothing more.

"Deleting Messages."

_Beep_.

-0-0-0-0-


	4. Chapter 4

_Writer's Note: Thank You Very Much For All The Reviews! They Motivate Me To Keep Writing And They Help Me Write Better! :) I Have Decided To Do Jack's Perspective Along With Renee's Perspective, In order To Just Change Things Up Here And There! So Before Each Chapter Starts I Will Write Whose Perspective The Chapter Is In! :) Another Big Thanks To Tiffany For Editing & Reviewing The Story! Please Keep Reviewing! It Is Very Much Appreciated! Hope You Enjoy! THANKS! :)_

Chapter 4

_(Jack's Perspective)_

I accepted my death. I had come to peace with what I had done. Although I wished I could have had more time to personally come to peace with everything. I was okay with dying. Okay to let myself go and never come back.

0-0-0-0-0

When I woke up I didn't understand why I was alive. Then I saw…

Kim.

She has saved my life against my wishes. Even so I have no bitter feelings because I am thankful for everyday I get to spend with my family. With Kim, Terri and Steven. I have everything I need in my life here with me.

I just wish I had…

Renee.

0-0-0-0-0

I wanted to help her, make her feel worthy again and prevent her from hurting herself again. The second I heard what she had done, my heart broke into a thousand pieces.

I understood her pain, her feelings of worthlessness and her feelings to just want to make everything go away. To be…

Gone.

0-0-0-0-0

Every time I dialed her number I anxiously awaited her voice…her real voice.

But all I ever heard was her recorded voice.

_Beep._

0-0-0-0-0

Many times I wanted to find her and talk to her, hold her and tell her everything is going to be okay, but I wanted to respect her. I didn't want to invade her personal space. So I let her be.

It kills me to just leave her alone, but I have come to respect the fact that she doesn't want to talk to me…or see me.

0-0-0-0-0

"Have you heard any news about Renee and her condition?" Kim asked, as she put away the dishes.

Not many people knew about Renee and what she had done. The only person I had told was Kim, considering her friendship with Renee. I also knew Kim would always be willing to talk to Renee…To help her through her struggles.

"No and she hasn't returned any of my calls."

"I think you should go see her and talk to her. She needs someone right now, someone who can understand her. And I think we both know who I am talking about."

I knew who she was talking about. As badly as I want to go, I don't know if I could do that to Renee.

"We'll see."

0-0-0-0-0


End file.
